(8 minute read)

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If you have skimmed through the various posts found here, you no doubt noticed a common theme. With experience as a life long communicator in media, profit/non-profit organizations, and academia I have learned one thing. It is possible to distill everything we say and do into one simple word. And, yet, we still know very little about it though we use it all the time. You are even using it now.

In Outer Space No One Can Hear You …Complain?

In September of 2023, Lieutenant Colonel (Lt. Col.) Francisco “Frank” Rubio accomplished something that no other American had ever done before or since.

The Los Angeles native was born in LA County to Salvadorian teenage parents in 1975. He moved to El Salvador. He lived his first six years of life there. In 1981, he and his mother moved back to the states. They settled in Miami staying there until Frank finished high school.

Choosing to enlist in the military he attended the United States Military Academy at West Point. There he earned a degree in international relations and volunteered to become a pilot. He flew missions in Bosnia, Iraq, and Afghanistan.

After his tour, Rubio attended the Uniformed Services University of the Health Sciences in Bethesda, Maryland. There he earned a doctorate of medicine degree. As if he hadn’t already accomplished enough, at the age of 42 he was selected into NASA’s astronaut program. He spent two-years in their training program.

In September of 2022, he and two other astronauts were launched into space. He was headed to the International Space Station where he was to spend the next six months. His mission was to run scientific tests including working with a new space aged material called aerogel. He ran a battery of tests using stem cells on diseases like leukemia and cancer. He also studied the effects of gravity on yeasts and bacteria to produce therapeutics and natural medicines.

Three months into the mission, however, the capsule meant for his return flight was hit with spam debris. A NASA spokesperson called it a “micro-meteor.” The impact produced a coolant leak and the capsule was deemed unsafe. He learned that he had no ride home.

The only option left was to wait for the Russian Space Agency to build a new space capsule. They then would launch it to the Space Station and then he could he return home. It also meant that the duration of his occupancy in the Space Station was now doubled. He would have to wait for more than a year to return home.

A year and one week after Lt. Col. Rubio stepped foot on the International Space Station he returned home after a record breaking 371 days spent in space. After a whirlwind four months of acclimating to earth’s gravity and spending time with family and friends while recuperating, Lt. Col. Rubio began meeting with various media outlets clamoring for an interview.

The one question asked over and over; what it was like to live through a year of excitement and disappointment?

Recently the scientific community has been talking about the possibility of traveling to Mars. Space travel is once again capturing the imagination of the American public. As a result, the information and experience that the Col. had would prove engaging. One such exchange took place earlier this year between the Lt. Col. and NPR’s Miles O’Brien.

O’Brien asked the Lt. Col. to describe, from a psychological perspective, what he felt throughout the year. He wanted to know what it was like to learn about the delay in returning home. It meant not seeing his family for a year. Instead of just six months he would have to wait more than a year.

In his answer the Lt. Col. credited his military training and experience as a contributing factor for helping him to cope with the disappointment.

“…a lot of our military often get told, hey, you’re staying a little bit longer than anticipated. I never got extended much longer than about a month,” he admitted. “(P)sychologically, it’s really not too different, whether it’s a month or six months.”

“It’s Really Not Too Different”

Lt. Col. Rubio’s admission is striking. Most of us loose patience when asked to stay an extra hour at work to complete a task. Or when we have to wait for a table to open up at our favorite restaurant. Or when we loose cell phone coverage or the internet seems to be a little slower this morning. And of course, most of us loose our shit when our Amazon shipment is delayed 24 hours because of …whatever!

Granted, these are all minor irritations. I believe most of us would hesitate to air those grievances while standing beside someone like a Lt. Col. Rubio. After all, we are only human, right?

But so is the Lt. Col.

It’s impressive what he has been able to accomplish so far in life. And I’ve only highlighted some of them. By all means, look him up. Read about this man who grew up in a single parent household in Miami. Discover all that he has accomplished. To learn about him is an inspiration.

Just what exactly does the Lt. Col. mean when he says “it’s not that different?” It can be summed up in one word. Perception. The mental stamina needed to settle in one place for six months is the same as what’s needed for one year. Even when we hadn’t planned on it.

Lt. Col. Rubio has accomplished a lot in life, more than many of us will ever come close to doing. Having the opportunity to meet the Col., I think he would be quick to tell us that he is not someone special. He isn’t someone born with special genetics that make him superhuman.

His abilities come down to training. In that training, psychologically speaking, he has learned to adapt to situations. These situations bring about change. In other words to be psychologically ready to change a perception to finish what needs to be accomplished.

The Col. is not any different from any of us. We can learn from his example without having to spend years in the military. We do not need to become a pilot, doctor, or astronaut. Anyone can change their perception if they are willing. Admittedly at times it will take some effort. However, the truth is many times, dare I say most times, the perception isn’t any different than our current perspective. It takes only a slight adjustment.

I own a satellite dish. Occasionally, the dish loses its alignment and the signal is lost. When that happens the company has to come out to make the proper adjustments to get the signal back. Most of those adjustments require less than an inch to fix the problem.

I think perspective for humans works the same way. One slight adjustment can bring us a great deal of clarity. Conversely, an inch off can result in a lot of static.

Things happen to us from time to time. Most of what comes at us is out of our control. Think about using your time and energy to adjust your perception instead of determining how unfair those things are. Our reaction to those circumstances makes all the difference. It determines whether we live with the lie that a perfect life is one without complications. .

Want to live a full life? The skill to learn is managing your perceptions.

Through trial and error, we begin to gain confidence. We learn to adjust our perceptions. This adjustment brings the change needed to overcome hardships. The first perception to change is the one that thinks that the perfect life is one without complications.

That reality does not exist.

Instead, understanding that life is full of persistent complications will equip you with a unique “superpower.” You will never be devastated when unexpected things happen. And they DO happen.

American author Ryan Holiday understands this power of perception perhaps better than any of his contemporaries.

“Where one person sees a crisis, another can see opportunity. Where one is blinded by success, another sees reality with ruthless objectivity. Where one loses control of emotions, another can remain calm. Desperation, despair, fear, powerlessness—these reactions are functions of our perceptions. You must realize: Nothing makes us feel this way; we choose to give in to such feelings.

…We can learn to perceive things differently, to cut through the illusions that others believe or fear. We can stop seeing the ‘problems’ in front of us as problems. We can learn to focus on what things really are.

…We have a choice about how we respond to [any] situation.”

ryan Holiday, The Obstacle Is The Way, Portfolio, 2014

According to Holiday and Lt. Col. Rubio …perception is everything.

Let that be according to you as well.